At least, I'm not.
Chris Rose said that everybody here is on Xanax or something. I need to be. I'm so friggin' bipolar now, I could have my own Lifetime movie.
Anybody else you know cries at least 5 days a week? Me neither.
I just about busted into tears in the friggin Whole Foods tonight. Of course, there, it was because of the prices.
I just don't have anything to say to anybody that isn't from NOLA. Everything else is just so trivial.
Yesterday I was looking at boats. Well, there are no used boats that aren't destroyed from K. There are no docks, anyway.
So I looked at inflatable boats, just in case another one comes this hurricane season. That will get the emotions going. They all cost too much, and I don't know that any of them are worth it, especially if it's just going to be a rescue boat.
Or even worse, a salvage boat.
I worry for my children. I really want them to grow up here, but hell, since they've stalled so long rebuilding the levees, we have our evac plan in place. If another one hits, I don't know if there will be anything to come back to.
The other night, a bunch of us were talking, and somebody was talking about getting a great job offer from somewhere. We all related the great job offers we had received.
Will later said something like "I have seen you three continue drinking when any respectable person would have already passed out."
I responded by saying "We're the dregs. Everybody wants us, but we foolishly want to stay here. This is the only place we fit in, and hey, we don't even fit in here. Who else have you ever seen get kicked out of Pat O'Brien's? Kicked out of the Half Moon? Who mooned a cop from the balcony? For some of us, the only reason we are not considered alcoholics is because we live in New Orleans."
That's why we stay. I am just so depressed about everything. I'm getting overwhelmed. What if New Orleans is gone? Where the hell can people like me go? Australia?
I've been dubbed Angry Ashley, but I'm not always like this. At least I'm usually civil.
Here's an email I sent to Carlos Mencia, after viewing a clip where he slammed New Orleanians:
Hello,After your remark about New Orleans culture and rebuilding, I can only hope that an earthquake kills your entire family. Then, maybe, you'll be "preserving your culture" in Kansas or something.
Welcome to our world, bitch. If the federal levees had been built properly, then I may still enjoy your comedy. As it is, you insulted us, and the only way you can feel our pain is by having your family die.
Enjoy.
Cold, but passionate. Unbelievably, he responded
Some of my family did die in some of the hurricanes in central America in the past. That is why I preserve my culture in USA, thousands of miles from the eye of the storm. Telling you to move far from danger is not fucked up on my part. I actually want to save lives.Carlos
He's honest, and I believe this is sincere. But he just doesn't get New Orleans.
Oh, and he lives in LA...
Why would I speak to a total stranger like this? I'm not well.
We are not OK.
Great post, Ashley. My wife and I are crazy hardcore New Orleanians too but she's on the faculty of LSU Med School and they've screwed the pooch so we're up in the air for the long run.
We'd feel like deserters if we left now and we're trying hard not to but may have no choice. Life is hard here right now but at least we're surrounded by people in the same leaky, fragile boat. Damn, that's more sincerity from me than you'll get for a full calendar year...
Posted by: adrastos | 02 April 2006 at 12:09 AM
Ashley, I wandered over here after reading your response to my comments at the Wet Bank Guide. I live in Atlanta but the middle of my three sons is a sophomore at Loyola and returned to New Orleans in January. I love the city and have been there frequently as he chose the school and then moved there, but she (and every one of her citizens, wherever they may be) has completely held my heart since I realized where Katrina was going and what she could do.
Great post.
Posted by: Sophmom | 02 April 2006 at 08:07 AM
I saw an AP article two days ago that said it could take from 5 up to 25 years for N.O. to fully recover. But most people I talk to think, OK, we're done with that - time to move on. They have no clue and have blinders on so they can't see the truth.
Posted by: saintseester | 02 April 2006 at 08:43 AM
I had someone tell me yesterday that New Orleans was exactly like Eugene, OR and that perhaps I would be happier living there if I was such a fish out of water... she had NEVER been to New Orleans, she claimed (with no prior knowledge of the area mind you) that creole=black and cajun=white and that I couldn't be creole because I don't look black, and I had just gotten done saying in an intense and passionate voice how unique the culture is in SE Louisiana and that the ONLY places similar might be Rio in Brazil or Hawaii. She came up with F---ing Eugene?! PLEASE! I had to check for April Fool's sarcasm (she was serious). I told her "no thanks, I hate hippies".
*banging head against wall*
Secession.
Posted by: Tim P. | 02 April 2006 at 11:16 AM
Believe it or not, I'll feel better after the next hurricane season. Once we figure out what's going to hold and what's not going to hold. I sure as hell don't trust anything being done right now, especially when you have independent agencies saying it's being done wrong. I think I know how you're feeling though - I was there about 4 months ago when I had to move to Houston, knew my house was wasted and I everything I owned fit in my four door car with room to spare, and the future of New Orleans was being debated by the decision makers of the nation. Everything was not ok. It's better today - not a utopia, but not a dystopia either. My advice, don't get on lexapro, the "minimal side-effects" seem to occur to everyone I know who used the stuff; and the drug keeps you from getting depressed but also keeps you from euphoria - you'll just be kinda pleased when you're at Jazz Fest, not truly happy. But wait six more months, things will be more concrete.
Posted by: Aaron | 02 April 2006 at 03:01 PM
P.S. to my last comment.
I'm sorry that you (and everyone else in New Orleans too!) is going through this horribly, overwhelming mindfuck. Those of us in other areas of the country can attest to the lack of understanding from the rest of the US... it's as if they all say "When Katrina hit, I gave (fill in the blank) and I'm a good person now. Those people need to fend for themselves." That was loosely based on several actual conversations from left-leaning, liberal-styled, anti-authoritarian Berkeley types. You guys ARE being ignored... actively and willingly.
Keep in mind, not everyone feels that way. And there are lots of people out there helping. And because I know New Orleans, I know it ain't going down without a very big and very loud fight.
Posted by: Tim P. | 03 April 2006 at 12:19 PM
I understand and feel the same.
Know that you are not alone. We will rebuild. Community is what will pull us through.
I humbly beg pardon from you, sir. I have been an ostrich ducking my head in the sand for the past month - no blogging.
The American ideal of rugged individualism and selfish achievement at the expense of others blows away like the plastic bags that once held Krewe D'Etat beads after the parade.
We will make our home better.
Last night, I attended a lecture at Loyola by Dr. Boyd Blundell. It was a real taste of our new life here.
He has a blog:
http://www.tpmcafe.com/node/28359
Crescent City Classic is coming.
FQF is coming.
Hell, Friday is coming.
Posted by: dillyberto | 03 April 2006 at 01:54 PM
I watched Carlos Mencia Sunday night with http://prostheticallyhip.com/ and at first I was pissed but then I let it go and think he might have been short on material. His jokes were dumb and I think that comedy central should have not aired the show.
Posted by: CHOMPS | 04 April 2006 at 02:29 PM
Leave it up to a no talent assclown like yourself to make me actually like Carlos Mencia...
You are not ok...you are gloriously 2nd rate...which I'm sure you're ok with...
Have another drink, boys...the world is going to work every day and passing you by...and you call it "culture"
Posted by: Snooch | 05 April 2006 at 11:36 PM
Yeah, Snooch,
Average, lead-poisoned Romans said things like "We're going to work every day and passing you (stupid Gauls, Brits, etc) by . . ."
Those smart, hard-working Romans sure did a nice job maintaining their empire. You know, with their incestuous leadership, sons of former leaders as leaders, etc.
Good thing the American empire isn't following that course.
Keep driving your fat ass to work in some POS SUV and laughing at us, Snooch. Hurry! Hurry! You might be late!
Posted by: Mr. Clio | 06 April 2006 at 06:21 AM
What a "class-act" snooch (NOT), kicking a guy when he's down.
Posted by: saintseester | 06 April 2006 at 07:33 AM
"After your remark about New Orleans culture and rebuilding, I can only hope that an earthquake kills your entire family."
Is this the guy that's the class act? Or is this the guy that deserves my pity cuz he's down?
Hey New Orleans...you're down, but no one is crying for you...now get your ass up...it's not that you're incapable, it's that you're unwilling...
Posted by: snooch | 06 April 2006 at 11:56 AM
Oh I love it I love it I love it! Keep the justifications comin' Mr. Clio...
I've never thought of it that way, man...you've opened my eyes to a cultural value that I never realized about New Orleans. So you're saying that, by collectively sitting on the porch all afernoon with a tallboy, you're preventing empire, incest, nepotism, lead poisoning, SUVs, and the most unemployable of personal traits, tardiness...
On second thought, don't keep 'em comin' MR. Clio. Give it up. You're obviously a learned person, but your judgement is clouded. You're too close and cannot regard our city objectively.
Lazy is not culture, and making fun of the guy that's on-time is not a defense of it.
Posted by: snooch | 06 April 2006 at 12:22 PM
Snooch, you have no idea what you are talking about. There is so much still up in the air that people don't know what to do. FEMA hasn't even released new flood maps, 7 MONTHS LATER. We have no idea when block grants will be awarded. Some people don't have insurance money yet. Schools are closed, there are no hospitals, thousands of cars still need to be towed.
Despite all of that there are hundreds of thousands of people back in the metro area, fixing homes, working their jobs and moving along.
My wife and I lost EVERYTHING at our home in midcity. We were lucky because we both have decent jobs that were able to keep us on and we found a place to rent that was DOUBLE our old rent. We were able to get back to the city relatively early, back in October. There are thousands of people in this city like us.
You have no idea what you are talking about.
Posted by: Jonah | 06 April 2006 at 12:23 PM
Snooch,
All I know is that I bust my ass every day. I recognize the stereotype you describe, but I don't see many examples of it in my world in the City of New Orleans.
I choose the imperfections of New Orleans over the imperfections of other places. I am not angry at those other places. You seem to be angry at us. Go in peace, bra.
However, if you think other American cities are somehow moral exemplars for "lazy, alcoholic" New Orleanians, I would have to disagree.
Posted by: Mr. Clio | 06 April 2006 at 12:54 PM
By the way, the FEMA people who are so derelict about releasing those flood maps Jonah's talking about? How many of 'em do you think are from New Orleans?
Our lazy president? Where's he from? The cowardly and lazy CEO of Ruth's Chris? Where's he from?
Posted by: Mr. Clio | 06 April 2006 at 12:56 PM
From snooch: "it's not that you're incapable, it's that you're unwilling..."
And with that, goodbye, snooch!
And don't call me an assclown. Assmime, maybe.
Posted by: ashley | 06 April 2006 at 01:07 PM
Also, you're not Angry Ashley.
Months ago, I dubbed thee
The Inimitable Ashley
You and I have simple demons, sir. Mr. Snooch has Mutant Intestinal Parasites from Hell.
Posted by: Mr. Clio | 06 April 2006 at 01:12 PM
I go away for one day...
An assmime, does that mean that one has to have expressive cheeks? Or just real white?
Posted by: Tim P. | 07 April 2006 at 01:56 AM
Man, I wish I could edit comments. It's late, I plead insanity due to insomnia... I meant "Or just real white ones?"
Posted by: Tim P. | 07 April 2006 at 02:02 AM
Where yat, Ashley? After such bumpy post, it'd be good to hear something from you.
Posted by: Mr. Clio | 10 April 2006 at 07:29 AM
At the risk of making clueless comments (hey, I'm brave). On your way earlier messages. I can see the guy from Los Angeles' point about moving away from areas that could kill your family - I used to say that back in high school about earthquakes in California! The point is everywhere has something unsafe. I almost moved to Mobile, AL in 2004 because I love that whole region - the culture aspects are unbeatable (and Mobile is only a taste of NOLA).
My brother in-law is currently working construction in NOLA - repairing the schools - I couldn't imagine what he's been describing - I work for a mid-western newspaper and I keep telling him to bring his stinkin' digital camera photos and I'll try to get our publisher to print them. Anyway, my family and I are planning to visit this spring - 'cause I wanna see for myself - I keep trying to find a way to get down there and volunteer but I've got a lot of small kids and no money so I still working on the logistics - one of those good ideas that most likely will never happen.
What I end up hearing from my brother in-law is about all the waste and inefficiency - just the mere fact that they hired my brother in-law who has no good track record in managing projects - I'll can completely imagine that basically no work is getting done.
Posted by: hythlodaeus | 22 January 2007 at 10:17 AM
Males should be allowed to go shirtless at home only - Or vary with places for another persuasive speech topic
Posted by: homer simpsons dad | 21 August 2007 at 02:19 PM
I haven't gotten much done , but it's not important. Not much on my mind lately. Today was a total loss, but so it goes.
Posted by: phones | 04 September 2007 at 03:51 AM
loose weight lest then a month if i eat cereal and fruit and it a small dinner all day and walk a lil bit will i loose weight like that i way about 150lb but the problem is i am by too many fast food restaurants i kept on saying am not going eat there but i end up doing it is hard to past up a juicy hamburger or chicken sh-rips something like that i want to be at least 100-110 i really want a flat belly loll so i hope yall give me some good suggestest
Posted by: Soft Cialis | 20 November 2009 at 03:13 PM