If you don't laugh, you'll cry

Something light.

I heard my wife laughing her ass off today while looking at her computer. "What are you looking at?" I asked. "Your blog" she answered. "You seem to enjoy calling women twits and bitches, whereas men are assholes. You're nice to me, though."

Whew.

Read this, where Tim rips your heart out. Yes, they're still finding bodies. And skulls. And it's not over.

Before I just lose it, I'll veer to Ray's Evel Knievel adventure, as suggested by the wonderfully written You stay classy, America.

When I left Tulane, I got my first professor gig at the University of Idaho. When people asked me why I went to Idaho, I pointed to the 8x10 glossy in my office of Evel standing in front of the Snake River Canyon, and I told them "I came to avenge Evel's Snake River Canyon jump", with a perfectly straight face. They didn't know what to say.

When I was about 13 I had an Evel Knievel 10 speed. White, with EK on the seat. Man, was he not the closest thing to a hero that boys of that era had? Years later, when I was a freshman at FSU, my nice new bike was stolen 3 days after my dad bought it. He brought me the EK, and that thing was absolutely theft proof.

Even today, I have to think of Evel, because I have a fake front tooth from the time I tried to set the neighborhood record and go for the astonishing 7 anti-freeze jugs in a row jump (not on the 10 speed, but the Yamaha moto bike). Because my fall didn't look like Robert Craig Knievel at the Caesar's Palace Fountains, I got up, spit out a quarter of my left front incisor, and tried it again.

Second time, I ended up spitting out another quarter of my left front incisor. To my knowledge, nobody ever made the 7 anti-freeze jug jump. Perhaps, one day, someone will avenge me.

Comments

[Ray]

With banana seat!

My aging ass says that the banana seat needs to come back in style.