Parading: a contact sport

One day, I will hit every parade on the eastbank. Not this year.

The 1 1/2 year old got a cold, and last night at the Thursday night parades got whacked in the face by an over-exuberent Chaos crew member who flung an unwrapped bundle of beads at her. Mom was holding her, and despite being Czech, doesn't have the Hasek-like reflexes of dad, so she got it in the face. She cried for a while, then recovered and wanted more beads, but today, the cold was really bad, and she had 2 kinda black eyes and a swollen nose.

Which meant we had to blow off parades on Friday night, including one of my faves, Krewe d'Etat. Gotta love the skull beads with the LEDs, man. I have some from 2002 that still work!

Elizabeth Hovde, a frigid bitch from the land where they think that using black pepper is living on the wild side, says that using taxpayer money to rebuild NOLA is a waste. In my typical understated, subtle way, I emailed her a response, and asked her to do something that is probably physically impossible (though I'd like to try) with a kitchen utensil.

OK, it was a rolling pin. I thought about a baseball bat, but I figured she had a rolling pin in the house.

And anybody that cites Tim Kusky as an authority is totally incompetent. This guy studies plate tectonics. I have more business being an expert on the levees as a PhD that actually studies geography, and lives here. Don't believe me, then ask NATO. I really want to bitch-slap this guy in person, not just in print.

My one paragraph on the ports: With globalization and this post-capitalism mentality, I can see how having a UAE firm managing the ports could happen. What if they reincorporate in the Carribbean? Will that make a difference? It did for Stanley, until public outcry forced them to backtrack. The problem for the Bush adminstration is that they have everyone so reactionary to fear and Arabs, that when something like this comes along (as is inevitable with globalization), they can't have it both ways. The whole fear Arabs and embrace globalization, because it's really good for the boards of multinational corporations the American people has collided, and this is the crap that BushCo now has to deal with. And not everybody's buying it, although it did come from Pottery Barn.

Speaking of globalization, when will we get rid of this Olympic patriotic act. Let's have olympians compete for their corporate sponsors.

And in the medal count, Jim, Nike is kicking the holy shit out of Adidas/Salomon/Reebok by 217 to 12.

That's gotta hurt Adidas/Salomon/Reebok, Bob.

Not really, Jim. Think of Adidas/Salomon/Reebok as the Greece of sport manufacturers. They had their glory years, and now they are on the wane. Nike, of course, is China.

You know, Bob, Nike does make Google filter out all criticism of Nike in Oregon.

As well they should, Jim. It's their state.

Doesn't that mean it's China's state?

Right you are, Jim. Now, back to the Gatorade curling finals!

This guy has much more patience than me. I would have been courted off by air marshalls about 10 minutes after takeoff. My technique for my weekly Chicago-NOLA flights is to wear stinky shoes with no laces, and be as sleep deprived as possible. The Run-D.M.C. look makes it easy for me to take the shoes off for the metal detector (Thanks, TSA! to be read with the same sarcasm as Thanks, Houston), and the stench keeps fellow passengers from conversing with me. The sleepiness, along with a couple of Vicodin every trip, help me ignore my flightmates, and the associated drool scares off even those desperate for conversation.

Man, are these things beautiful. Here's a great idea, in the tradition of great architectural ideas following tragedies, and this probably won't see the light of day. I want to see these everywhere. For the price of a FEMA trailer, which have a life expectancy of less than a year, these can be built. They aren't eyesores, they fit just about anywhere architecturally, and they can be expanded. I wanna see some in purple. Hell, I want one in my backyard. I need the rental income to pay my newly raised Cox, Entergy, and Farmer's rates.

So I plan to go to Gatemouth's funeral on Saturday, the Wild Magnolias on Sunday, and all the parades in between. Also plan to meet up with some fellow blogger types.

Oh, and it happened. Somebody recognized me as the Krewe du Vieux mime, when I was in street clothes. Oh, the horror. Actually, it was one of the guys at the flag store at Magazine and Jackson, so it wasn't too bad. I was in there picking up my NOLA flag, my trois-fleurs-de-lis French flag, and my tricolore French flag. With those, and the Czech and Carnival flags we already have, there should be a nice rotation on the front of the house. Until Tuesday: the blue french flag and the carnival flag. Next up: NOLA.

Passez un bon week-end.

Comments

[Ray]

I'd love to have one of those Cusato cottages as a beach house for weekends or vacation. I'd furnish it with second-hand or hand-me-down furniture, and when the hurricane comes and the storm surge carries it out to sea, no catastrophic loss -- just buy a new one. (All I need is some beachfront property to put it on.)

[Tim P.]

First, I hope the littlest one gets better soon... poor thing!

Second, you're absolutely correct about the UAE and ports... it's amazing to see how venomous and savage the self-styled liberals out here go on about that very issue. They just stop short of saying "The Towel-Heads are coming!". I really don't have much to say about it except that I'm sure Bush and Co. will make a pretty penny on the deal... they don't seem to do much without cash being involved.

It was funny reading the bit about the conversation on the plane last week. I saw a lot of the same inner dialogue that I have when dealing with barbarians, but I lack the censor... it's awfully one-sided.

PS... a rolling pin is too kind. A cheese grater would have been more efficient.

[Mr. Clio]

Ashley,

Thanks for the link to the brilliant Ms. Hovde. I emailed her the following. I don't expect a response:

Ms. Hovde:

Numerous media sources and citizen journalists have conclusively shown that President Bush’s figure of $85 billion for recovery is a fraud, at least so far. You probably don’t have to worry about that much of American tax dollars going to save our region.
Our city is sinking in large part because of the decisions and behavior of the rest of America, which has been getting a pleasant ride at the expense of our health and long-term viability. A shared solution, paid for in part by those who have enjoyed the ride, is just. We will not beg for that which any fair assessment of the situation would rightly award us.
While you hear our public appeals to justice, you do not see the hard work and grit we are exerting here.
I promise I will forget your self-congratulatory rhetoric the next time your region is hit by a national disaster or terrorist attack. I will advocate that you and your countrymen are Americans who deserve American assistance.
At the minimum, you owe us gratitude for showing how utterly unprepared our “homeland security” president and his minions have left this country. The past six months have shown that you had better watch your own back, because the federal government certainly is not.

Those are the most pressing responses that I have to your article.

Sincerely,
Mr. Clio

[Kasia]

Lana Kelly - Hey! So what about this picture party? My peeps are lined up and wntaiig!!! Call me when u get a chance 429-4792. How many months ahead are u scheduling right now? Do I need to go ahead and book for fall? Let me know. I'm needing a photo fix! LOLLana