Ashley Morris: the blog

Bye Bye Lindy Boggs Medical Center

From the T-P.

A Georgia real estate firm planning to build a sprawling mixed-use development in New Orleans' Mid-City neighborhood won city approval Monday to demolish the Lindy Boggs Medical Center, which now stands vacant on a chunk of land considered crucial to the project.

Blame Victory Real Estate, blame Ochsner, blame Tenet.

Just look at Victory's website (Don't miss the ever-pleasant Alton Darby, and his mook-de-camp Kent Cost), and check out their enlightened idea of appropriate architecture.

I call it strip mall hell. I'm not necessarily against development, and God knows we could use some in mid city, but please, make it look like it belongs there.

2007 is over

Good riddance. Don't let the door hit you in your fat ass when you leave, 2007. Shitty birthday, mediocre Christmas, losing season for the Saints.

Shitty year, but the kids are somewhat healthy. I plan on abusing the fuck outta my liver tonight.

Oh, and next year will rock.

Fire and Gasoline

One of my favorite Iguanas songs.

I think I like Boom Boom Boom the best, and my 2nd daughter was almost named Isabel thanks to them.

However, this is in response to Mr Cl10's plea for action.

Sunday, your New Orleans Saints travel to Chicago to take on the Bears.

Remember the last time the Saints were there?

Remember the class of the Chicago Bears' fans, staff, and management?

They were telling people who lost their families and everything they had in a disaster that they wish you had died as well?

Let's return the favor.

These people are not human.

This time, if you're a New Orleans fan at Soldier field, remember that there is such a thing as justifiable homicide.

Let's finish what Chicago's favorite son, John Wayne Gacy started.

Let's finish what the 1995 heat wave started.

Crush them all and make their fans wish they had died with Gacy.

Fight fire with napalm.

Eat Bear.

Has anyone seen him?

Mike Hunt (no, I'm not kidding), Bacchus spokesman and alleged patron of Moe's Tavern here defends their selection of Terry Bollea, aka Hulk Hogan as king of Bacchus.

Bacchus now joins the ranks of irrelevant parades (like Dick Clark didn't do it...). Long live Krewe du Vieux!

Typepad goes Spam crazy

For those of you that may have been informed that your comment was Spam: "We’re sorry. We messed up, the anti spam system got way too aggressive, and we were trying to dial it back in small increments instead of what we eventually did, which was flipping all the way back to a setting that we know works for most people."

So keep plugging.

"She has been martyred"

This is so very, very bad, you can't imagine how bad it is. It's not that the loss of Benazir Bhutto is not tragic. It's beyond tragic. She was first elected prime minister of Pakistan when she was 35, after her father, the former prime minister, was hanged after a charge of corruption. She was the first woman to lead a Muslim country.

Charges of corruption followed her, as did tragedy. Two of her brothers were murdered mysteriously.

Whether she was corrupt or not, she was intelligent and charismatic. Unfortunately, this assassination will destabilize what little stability there was in Pakistani politics.

Unfortunately, this could have an impact all over the Muslim world. I sincerely hope not.

As-Salamu Alaykum.

Goodness from Maine

A letter to the editor of the Maine Courier-Gazette from the teacher leading the group, and an Editorial from Stephen Betts both focus on positive actions related to the planned student recovery trip in New Orleans.

My prior posts on this issue.

Thanks, guys. We really appreciate it.

World class -- everyday

So Ray and I were going to meet for coffee, but he had a conference call and I was getting my titanium glasses frames welded. Which meant it was time for lunch. I suggested po-boys at Calhoun Superette, but he had a better idea: let's go to a place we haven't been for a while. Let's go to Willie Mae's. Sure.

On the way there, I said that I heard that Dooky Chase's was open again. If it is, let's go there, 'cause I've been to Willie Mae's since the flood, but not Dooky's.

Sure thing, they were open. But for take-out only.

While we sat at the bar nursing our Barq's in the bottle, we were figuring out where to go to eat. The Quarter? Maybe, but we'd have to find parking. The levee? OK, but it was kinda cold, and the levee would be windy. Ray's house or my house? Nyaaahhh, wrong vibe.

Ray said: Howzabout we walk across the street, and sit on the stoop of one of the buildings at Lafitte?

Hell yeah.

We both admired the architecture of the buildings at Lafitte, and genuinely hope that they can be saved. These aren't the typical crime-ridden buildings one thinks of in housing projects -- these buildings were peoples' homes.

We got a few bizarre looks, a couple of mean ones, and plenty of smiles as we took our Dooky booty across the street to Lafitte. I'm not sure, but we may have even been on the local Fox newscast that night, as they were taping both inside Dooky's and pointing the camera across the street.

There on the stoop, we tore into a whole fried chicken, macaroni and cheese casserole, mixed greens, and candied yams that tasted more like bread pudding. An excellent meal, as you can see.

If we worked anywhere else, we'd be having lunch. Here in New Orleans, we were having a world class meal. For lunch.

I don't have any solution for public housing, but we need to get our people back here. And there is some good news: Dooky Chase should open for full service around January 8.

Merry Christmas to all, and keep the X in Xmas.

---

Update: Check out Ray's recollection. This is the place; this is the life.

taking up the slack

Since the yellow blog sucks (update: finalment! it's here!), here's a brief roundup of last week's Saints game. As is tradition, photos are shamelessly stolen credited to the Times Picayune.

We kicked booty.

Evidently, Lance Moore took some punt return lessons from Reggie Bush, and wandered about aimlessly several times, lots of East-West running and a muff. Lance, buddy, do like you've done the last 14 weeks, and we'll consider this an anomaly. Also, why not run one back, dammit. Pretend you're Beerman.

David Patten decided he would do what my dad used to call "Pruitt it". This is a reference to former Oklahoma running back Greg Pruitt, who had amazing moves, but would carry the ball away from his body with one hand, thus ensuring a fumble on every fifth or sixth play. It appears that Mr Patten decided this would be a good way to carry the ball, and it was promptly swatted away. I heard Mr Patten being interviewed on WWL radio, and he said that he believed that there was no one on that side of the field except the safety in front of him. He also said he won't do it again. Let us hope so.

Drew Brees: 26 of 30. But not good enough for the pro bowl. Yeah, that Tony Romo showed us last week how he's light years ahead of Drew. Hasselbeck too. I can't wait to meet these mooks in the playoffs. At one point the Saints were pinned deep in our own territory on a misplayed punt, and Drew calmly dropped back in the end zone and threw a dart to Billy Miller. When asked what option Miller was, Brees later said: "3rd look". Let me break that down for you. Brees was in his own end zone, ignoring the risk of a safety, and looked at the first receiving option. That man was covered. He looked at the second, and that man was covered as well. Finally, he saw that Miller was open, and he fired the ball to him. That is why Drew Brees is one of the top 5 quarterbacks in the league. When interviewed this week, Brees said that at this level, everyone can throw the ball -- the thing that makes you good is your ability to see where receivers will get open and when. Bite me, Tony Romo.

Aaron Stecker and Pierre Thomas: the Reuben Mayes and Dalton Hilliard of the present. Mayes Stecker fumbled on the first possession, which didn't silent the crowd nearly as much as the Patten fumble. It seemed to serve to make Aaron mad, which is a good thing. He tore through the redbirds for 95 yards, just missing his second consecutive 100 yard rushing week. Dalton Pierre had 2 rushes for about a 10 yard average, putting a big ass bow on the victory. Coach decided he would just run it down their throats until they decided they would stop the run. Then and only then did he open up the passing attack. It's nice to have a running tandem that can do that.

And for the non-linemen out there, there is nothing an offensive lineman likes better than run blocking. They get to go after the defensive players, rather than standing back and pushing them. This made everybody happy.

Colston had yet another 100 yard game. And he's not even a pro bowl alternate. What a load of horse hockey.

Shocking statement of the game, from one Ashley Morris to Mr Cl10: "Copper is money". I was, of course, referring to pennies, or stealing pipe from houses and taking it to the recycling place. No, really, Copper did a hell of a job, except for getting faked out of his jock on the fake punt.

And the first pass of the game was to Karney. Any wagers this week? Maybe open up with Hollis in the backfield, lead blocking for Frenchy?

Steve Weatherford made a tackle that led me to believe he used to be a calf roping specialist in the National Finals Rodeo.

Gary Gibbs showed an aversion to blitzing, even though it seems to work frighteningly well, because it may remove the "surprise" factor. In any case, new papa Scott Fujita had a couple of sacks. Why does Fujita get more sacks than Charles Grant, like, ever? Anyway, the line was very solid against the run. And when Scott Shanle gets a pick, you're doing something right.

Ignoring my advice, Gibbs kept Hollis at Nose Tackle and Jason David at CB. I swear, just let Hollis give the guy a chuck at the line, and he'll be on his ass the entire play -- Hollis won't even need to run.

The safety tandem of Kaesadilla and Harper has looked tremendous since Kaesadilla kracked the starting lineup. Almost good enough to make you forget about the non-dreadlocked CB. Almost. Kaesadilla made one amazing tip near the line of scrimmage to save a TD. I hate to say it, but a definite upgrade over Josh Bullocks.

At a certain point, the game was in the bag, and we just had to run out the clock. The denizens of 635 decided the best way to do that was either a double reverse flea flicker, or a halfback pass hook and lateral. Payton, shockingly enough, decided to just hand it off to Mayes or Hilliard Pierre or Steck. Amen.

New kicker Martin Gramatica nailed his first field goal, and made all four of his extra point attempts non-events. Exactly what one wants in a kicker. However, he did get one kickoff out of bounds, which didn't hurt too much. John Carney is still employed by the Kansas City Chiefs, unfortunately.

This old and ancient Saints flask made it into the game. Engraved "Doctor Ash" by my brother in law, the same guy that gave me the "Dr Morris" jersey, it was a Christmas gift long ago. The dents were kindly provided by the TSA. It contained what is evidently a magic elixir, Absolut New Orleans.

Now, while this mango and black pepper flavored vodka may be disgustingly offensive to some many most; when ice cold, it is wonderfully fragrant, with a mango splash at the beginning and a wonderful peppery finish. When warm, it's noxious. But while drinking this during a game, the Saints are undefeated. Guess what will be in the magic flask this weekend?

and how thick is your skin?

Yeah, I sometimes say incindiery things here. I know it. But typically, I'm targeting those in power: the elected officials, the rich and powerful.

I was thinking about this when I was reading the comment a reader made to the letter I wrote to the Maine paper.

It shouldn't have bothered me much but it did. It did, because this anonymous mook challenged me. You know, I accept that challenge. This commenter said that no one in New Orleans used the phrase "Sinn Fein". If this is so, then why come my Sinn Fein post is the 11th most popular use of the phrase Sinn Fein. Not in New Orleans, not in the US, but in the world. The entire friggin' Google world, including Ireland.

I didn't mention Sinn Fein in that letter to the editor. It wasn't the time or place. In that letter, I was simply trying to pressure the powers that be in that town. I want them to realize how much we appreciate the kids coming down here to help, how much we need their help, and how we aren't anything like the national media portrays us.

I mentioned Sinn Fein in the letter to the Bahraini paper, but they changed my phrase from "the hurricane didn’t destroy New Orleans, the criminal failure of the levees did" to "the hurricane didn't destroy New Orleans, the government's failure did". They blew it. The whole point of that letter was to a) thank the people of the Arabian Gulf who contributed to our welfare, and b) let the people there know that the failure of the federally designed, built, and maintained levees was what devastated New Orleans.

There, Sinn Fein was appropriate, because I was talking about how the people of the Arabian Gulf are helping us. We may think it's all Sinn Fein, but we are getting help: from schoolkids in Maine to the government of Qatar.

So when I go after somebody, chances are it's because they're in a position of power, or they have made themselves enough of a public figure that they should expect it (like Jay Arena). I don't mind an honest challenge to the things I write.

I don't know Sharon Jasper's situation, but I know she hasn't really helped in the housing crisis in NOLA. Neither have people like Nicholas528. The people making sensible statements are people like Jocquelyn Marshall and Wayne Woods and even James Carter.

It seems like we all want the same thing more or less, but we just have different ways of getting there. People like Midura and me want the public housing that's being torn down replaced ASAP. People like Stacy Head and David Vitter don't want public housing at all, but instead a section 8 bonanza for landlords.

Stacy Head really showed what an ass she was today. She blew kisses to the crowd of protesters. Unbelievable. I always knew and said that she was a developer, she had the backing of the developers, and she overtly disdained non-homeowners; but for a public figure to basically tell the crowd to kiss her ass is a political faux pas of biblical proportions.

Astonishing, from someone who appeared to be becoming a long-term fixture in NOLA politics. I have a feeling this little move just turned her into a one or two-term councilperson, who will go back to flipping houses and lawyerin' when her terms are done.

So with all that in mind, before anyone attacks anyone else, it might do us all good to listen to the words of Craig Ferguson, explaining why he wasn't going after Britney Spears. Thanks and a hat tip to Jeff, via Nancy. Oh, and Sinn Fein.