He for whom the word was coined

And the word is fuckmook.

No, this time I'm not talking about George Shinn.  Shinn is still a fuckmook, as his thinly veiled attempts at blowing smoke up the collective ass of New Orleans sports fans have not worked.  We know you want to go to OKC, Georgie, but you fucked up!  Seattle is moving there, and you better not piss anybody off here, in OKC, or in Seattle, or you're gonna be left holding a wet sack of merde.

We haven't bought the tix because you haven't committed to us, sweetie.  Make a statement, and the fans will respond. 

You ain't like the Saints.  Nobody's daddy has told them about the glory days of the Hornets coming to town.  You have to commit to us, dahlin'.

Til then, you're a fuckmook.

Back to the fuckmook at hand: Alan Richman.

Why should you listen to what this fuckmook says about food?  Well, you shouldn't.

Basically, in his GQ article (not available online), he slams New Orleans for: having mediocre restaurants for decades, not knowing how to prepare trout meunière, not having any real Creole people (although the fuckmook talked to Leah Chase for hours), and of course, we shouldn't be rebuilt.

Robert Peyton skewered him well (make sure to check out the comments), but Mr. Peyton, as I, tends to work blue when annoyed. Brett Anderson does a nice job keeping it clean.

Once somebody says NOLA shouldn't be rebuilt, it becomes a bit personal for me.

Rot in hell, fuckmook, and do it soon.

Comments

[karen boudreaux]

AMEN

[bigshot]

Don't listen to this Richman podcast. "New Orleans shouldn't exist." http://odeo.com/audio/2235181/view

[Marco]

He's obviously senile. Look at the photo. Fuck his GQ ass.

[ashley]

He kinda looks like a slightly retarded, moustachioed Johnny Sack.

And Bigshot, I didn't want to link to that podcast and have him tell me about "Louisa's" by the tracks.

Everybody, make sure you look at Robert Peyton's post and comments. He covers it well.

[ashley]

Here's something I posted on the GQ forums:

Sir,

Mr. Richman's article about New Orleans and her food was unduly antagonistic. Perhaps Mr. Nagin was correct with his "hole in the ground" analogy. To state that New Orleans should not be rebuilt is the height of both arrogance and ignorance by a man that is evidently incapable of either compassion or good taste.

Also, perhaps you could find a page, an intern, or better yet a "handler" for Mr. Richman, to instruct him on: the proper preparation of trout meunière; the fact that Louisiana speckled trout can indeed weigh fifteen pounds; the fact that Leah Chase, Beyonce, Don Vappie, and Bryant Gumbel are all Creole; and finally, the fact that New Orleans and the Louisiana coast are responsible for most of the oil and seafood that you all seem to love so much.

I can't take this man's opinion about anything seriously when he complains about the oysters that he ordered in July...

He is now as irrelevant as his opinions on food.

New Orleans must be rebuilt, and I say the levees should be armored with Richman's skull as a start.

Thank you for your time.

[jeffrey]

Can you say douchebag?

I know I can

[ashley]

I voted for you to keep saying it.

[Chuck]

I'm fond of the term "fucknuckle", myself.

Alan Richman is an ignorant fucknuckle.

[Michael]

Calling Richmond "douchebag" is an insult...to douchebags.

[G Bitch]

And you better stop insulting the real fuckmooks.

[Karen]

here are some handy dandy gq e mails have at it

thecritic@optonline.net
jim_nelson@gq.com, michael_hainey@gq.com, fred_woodward@gq.com, jim_moore@gq.com, erik_meers@gq.com, andy_ward@gq.com, joel_lovell@gq.com, jason_gay@gq.com, mark_healy@gq.com, adam_rapoport@gq.com, john_gillies@gq.com, mickey_rapkin@gq.com, devin_friedman@gq.com, chris_huvane@gq.com, alex_pappademas@gq.com, nate_penn@gq.com, candice_rainey@gq.com, kevin_sintumuang@gq.com, andy_comer@gq.com, greg_veis@gq.com, laura_vitale@gq.com, ted_klein@gq.com, rebecca_peterson@gq.com, leah_zibulsky@gq.com, lucas_zaleski@gq.com, jordan_reed@gq.com, david_gargill@gq.com, kyla_jones@gq.com, benjamin_phelan@gq.com, thomas_wallace@gq.com, info@frenchculinary.com

[Mr. Clio]

He looks like the kind of guy who enjoys trips to the proctologist.

[Therese]

As a (French) Creole myself, I say WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?!